Love, Inc

Love, Inc by Yvonne Collins & Sally Rideout 2011
Hyperion/Disney Book Group

Rating: 3.5/5

IQ "Relationships are like sports. If you want to compete, you have to keep in shape." Kali pg. 235

Zahra, Kali and Syd meet in therapy. Their therapy group is for the children of divorcees. Even though all the teens in the group would quickly tell you that it's their parents who need to be in therapy not them, the girls ignore the cheesiness of therapy and reluctantly become friends after a scavenger hunt throws them together. It doesn't hurt that they discover they all dated the same guy who went by a different name. Erick aka Rico aka Rick. The girls create a plan for sweet revenge and payback feels awesome. In fact their plan was so good that other teens start approaching them for help on various matters of heart whether it's breaking up with someone, matchmaking, making up or exacting revenge. Love, Inc is born and business is booming. If only the three girls could practice what they preach.

This is my second (first) Collins & Rideout novel and once again the theme here is girl-who-complains-about-not-being-very-pretty and yet she manages to get ALL THE GUYS. It's completely baffling because it's not even as if she suddenly became more confident and therefore more guys start to sit up and take notice of her. I couldn't help but roll my eyes every time a new guy began flirting with her and/or asked her out because hey she was supposed to be mousy and nothing 'special'. And *SPOILER: highlight to read* Do couples really give one week anniversary presents? That's a bit much to me, but that could just be because I don't really keep track of anniversaries. *End of Spoiler*The other thing that really bothered me was the age of the girls. They were sophomores, Zahra was fifteen but they acted like they were juniors or seniors. It just didn't make sense to me that girls so young would have gone threw almost every single relationship problem one can experience in high school. I was really skeptical as to how well Kali's matchmaking formula worked that was the only part of the business that seemed highly implausible to me. Granted there are people who love to match make (hello Emma) but that doesn't mean they are always going to be good at it. Kali's system wasn't always perfect which I liked but it was a very vague process as to how exactly she calculated their compatibility.

Surprisingly this was one book I didn't mind not having the perspectives of all the main characters. Zahra best describes the three girls' personalities "Kali bubbles over with options, so if she were in charge of mediation, no one would stay together long. She's a 'grass is always greener' type, I'm a 'look how green this grass is' type, and Syd's a 'torch the lawn' type. The balance works for us" (pg. 263), and they become fully vibrant characters through her narration. Syd and Kali's stories were fully explored, I finished the book feeling as though I fully understood each of the three girls as well as the minor characters. It's a long book and sometimes I would put it down and forget to pick it back up but I never felt lost upon resuming it and the pace was good. The story is highly entertaining, the methods of revenge are mostly realistic and quite impressive in how easily they could be replicated in real life as are the other aspects of the business except for the matchmaking. The meditation process made a lot of sense, sometimes all relationships need is a person in the middle to help bring them to their senses. And as harsh as the break up service seemed, sometimes it was handled better than what the other person might have done.

Love, Inc is a diverting read that isn't sickeningly sick, instead it's the right mix of lighthearted fun combined with accessible, genuine lessons about crushes and relationships. A bonus was the fact that Zahra was half Pakistani but her heritage wasn't the center of the plot, instead it focused on her relationship business that she started with Syd and Kali. She does complain a lot about her Scottish red hair and not feeling like a fully fledged MOT (Member of the Tribe) but she worries that her mother's parents who are visiting from Pakistan want to keep her newly separated parents apart permanently. Therefore she does everything in her power to resist her grandparents efforts to make her fully embrace her heritage, she doesn't want it to seem like shes betraying her dad's heritage and giving up on their marriage. I also loved how the setting of Austin, Texas was like a fourth main character which I love especially because I know little about Texas. Austin sounds like a vibrant, entertaining and artful city. I definitely recommend this story for the summer, not too heavy but not too light and if you liked John Tucker Must Die, you will really like this book.

Disclosure: Received from Yan, thank you so much!

PS This quote amused me and also gave me something to think about

"'You're getting brainwashed and you don't even know it. Pretty soon they'll have you wrapped up in a sari and on a plane to Karachi. They'll marry you off to the first old guy who offers a decent dowry.'
'Zahra! You're like a racist or something.' [Saliyah-Zahra's sister]
'It's not racism when you're mocking your own culture'" (pg. 133). Hmm is it or isn't it? I'm inclined to agree with her but I'm not 100% sure how I feel about mocking your own culture. Especially because someone will inevitably complain that that's 'not fair'.

Male Monday: The Red Pyramid

The Red Pyramid (Kane Chronicles #1) by Rick Riordan
Hyperion/Disney Book Group

Rating: 3/5

IQ "It's a rare thing when an adult admits they are wrong to a child-especially a wise, two-thousand-year-old adult. You rather have to cherish those moments." Sadie pg. 349

Carter and Sadie are siblings, but they don't live together. When their mother died six years ago, they were split up. Carter (fourteen years old) travels around the world with their famous Egyptologist fatter, Dr. Julius Kane. He's homeschooled and rather socially awkward. Meanwhile, Sadie (his twelve year old sister) lives in London with their grandparents. Both Carter and Sadie want what they other has, Carter a "normal life", and Sadie wants more time with their father. They don't get along because they only spend a few days together a year and they don't understand each other. All this changes when on Christmas Eve when their father tries to release the spirits of gods through the Rosetta Stone, which ends in a disaster. Their father has been kidnapped by Set (an evil god of ancient Egypt) and it's up to Carter and Sadie to save him and/or the world. Along with Set, the other gods of Ancient Egypt are awakening and some of them help, and some hurt Carter and Sadie's mission. They are heading on a dangerous journey of magic and secrets in which not only must they battle gods, but they must fight the House of Life (a secret order of magicians that does not like the gods). And of course, they belong to no ordinary group.


See how long that summary is? Yeah it was exhausting to write and that pretty much describes my experience reading this book. It took FOREVER. It absolutely could not hold my interest. I must have picked it up, read 2 chapter and then forgotten about it completely at least once a month (and it took me about four months to finally finish). The book starts off rather slowly because it gives you a lot of background info and then it picks up for a bit. But then it's back to an excruciatingly slow pace with lots and lots of details. At first, I didn't mind all the details because I know relatively little about ancient Egyptian gods, beliefs and hieroglyphs. However after awhile it's a lot of information to remember. In addition to all this information, you must keep straight the Kane family history because there is a lot of secrets surrounding Carter and Sadie's parents and as the answers are slowly revealed, it becomes harder to recall it all. Furthermore, most reviewers have already said this but I agree so I'll repeat it. It was hard to notice the difference in Carter and Sadie's narration. Aside from Carter commenting on a cute girl and Sadie commenting on a cute god, there was no reliable difference in their voices (both of them have a sort of dry sense of humor that is present throughout the book). Also, I wish that Sadie had reflected more on being bi-racial. It's understandable that she wouldn't "feel Black" per se, since she's been raised by her white grandparents (the parents of her mother) but I expected her to at least reflect on that side of her heritage, to at least comment on how she feels estranged from it.

I did enjoy learning about ancient Egyptian culture and I did like the characters. My favorite characters were Bast, Khufu and Philip of Macedonia. Philip was an albino crocodile, Khufu was a basketball-playing baboon and Bast was the cat goddess. I liked that the animals couldn't talk but they still got their points across and made sure Carter and Sadie listened to them. I loved that Bast acted like a cat even in human form. It felt more authentic to me, that she would be afraid of the water and would only eat cat food. There is A LOT going on this novel. Carter and Sadie go to New Orleans and see the remnants of Hurricane Katrina along with a family of immigrants attempting to cross into America. Carter and Sadie also go to Memphis and learn about Elvis and Southern culture in addition to many other places and people. It seems kind of random, but I liked the idea of the author trying to show all different aspects of American life. I did appreciate that Carter and Sadie being bi-racial wasn't the main focus of the story, but it was a natural part of the story. It's important and not meant to be ignored. Sadie makes fun of Carter for dressing like a "old man", always in khakis and a button down shirt. But Carter's father has drilled into him that as a Black man, he must dress to impress. "'Carter, you're getting older. You're an African American man. People will judge you more harshly, and so you must always look impeccable.'
'That's not fair!' I insisted.
'Fairness does not mean everyone gets the same,' Dad said. 'Fairness means everyone gets what they need. and the only way to get what you need is to make it happen yourself. '" (pg. 67)

The Red Pyramid is a lively story but it's flow is uneven, and most of the story seems to drag on. There is a lot going on, but the author does bring it all together. It's a lot to handle and while the author does not always juggle everything successfully, the story has entertaining parts and the characters are clear and definite. I liked the magic and there's an element of satisfaction in watching Sadie and carter grow more confident in themselves and their powers. I like that they are ordinary kids who discover that there is something extraordinary about them, and that would be true even if they weren't magical. The story has some excellent twists but ultimately it just didn't make up for the long story. I'm curious as to whether or not this story has had success with its middle grade audience. Perhaps it will be able to keep their attention better than it kept mine. I'm not even sure if I care to follow up on the adventures of Sadie and Carter. It's a toss-up for me.

Disclosure: My sister bought it.

Girl vs. Boy

Girl v. Boy by Yvonne Collins & Sally Rideout 2008
Hyperion/Disney Book Group

Rating: 3.5/5

IQ "People like Scoop may want to cut straight to the reveal, but it's so much better to discover someone's personality layer by layer. By the time you've stripped to the core, you've built a solid relationship that may actually stand the test of time. [...] Best of all, he [Luisa's boyfriend] accepts that a slow burn is ten times hotter than a flash in the pan." Luisa/Newshound pg. 248

"How old are you, Newshound? Since our editor insists that you really are a Dunfield student, I can't help but wonder if your grandmother wrote your last column. Please tell me you don't believe that 'slow burn' garbage. One day, when you live in a geriatric condo, a slow burn will be all you can handle. In the meantime, why don't you enjoy life while you've still got your original body parts?[...] Wake up and smell the smoke, girlfriend, because there's a big difference between a slow burn and cold ashes." Scoop pg. 251

Luisa Perez is a sophomore in high school and probably one of the only students who has zero school spirit. Luisa and her friends work hard at avoiding all extracurricular activities. In a school with nine other sophomores named Luisa Perez (that is one diverse high school!), this Luisa does not particularly stand out. And she likes it that way. Except for the fact that she would like a boyfriend. However she doesn't think being an anonymous columnist for the school paper will help her in this respect so she's less-than-thrilled that her English teach volunteered her. even though Luisa views the column with trepidation, she decides that she does want to go to college and therefore she will need to put something on her college applications. Luisa's first assignment is to report on a battle of the sexes to see who can raise the most money for their school (the prize is getting an extra long winter break). Luisa will report on all events from the female point of view and an anonymous male columnist will report on events from the male perspective. Soon the columnists themselves are trading barbs back and forth about gender roles and relationships with the opposite gender. Luisa does not want to lose this battle, even though finding out who the male columnist is may ruin one of the best relationships she's ever had.

I apologize for the long summary, but there's some backstory that was needed to go into it. For the Incredible Quote, I included excerpts from both columns that show the two columnists engaged in "battle". Scoop is the guy, Newshound is Luisa. I had a hard time relating to Luisa because I can't imagine not having any school spirit. I firmly believe that you should attend at least one major sporting event for your high school each season (even if you don't like sports. Everyone is there and it's fun) and I can't imagine not being in any clubs. In Luisa's defense, she does have a job that keeps her very busy. she's a waitress and sometimes she has to cover her older sister, Grace's, shifts (usually when Grace is taking care of her daughter or going on a date with her baby daddy/on again-off again boyfriend Paz. In addition to (at first) not being able to relate to Luisa, I was irritated by how as soon as Luisa engaged in an extracurricular, boys were falling all over themselves to talk to her. True you meet more people at after-school events, but I find it hard to believe that without changing any aspects of her appearance or personality, she would discover all these new admirers (who were not all admirable). And let me just say that there's no way the city of Chicago would ever sponsor a contest as awesome as this one. Throughout the city of Chicago (although there is a tiny issue with this because I thought the story takes place in a suburb which would not be in Chicago...), schools are competing to see who can get the most money. The winner gets a full month off of school for winter break and in the battle of the sexes, the winning gender gets an extra three days off for spring break (the battle of sexes is only for Dunfield High School).

Obviously I loved the high energy of the columns. There are plenty of (mostly clean) innuendos, insults and retorts thrown about. A battle between genders is always intense and fun to read about and this one did not disappoint. One of the best parts of the book is trying to guess who the male columnist is. It's not easy and while it becomes clear towards the end who is NOT the columnist, I didn't expect the big reveal. I thought the whole time that it was the first guy. The relationships Luisa has with family and friends are borderline three dimensional. The characters are developed but not quite fully there. Luisa, Grace and their mother have issues but these issues are never addressed head on so there is no resolution or goal setting. I really liked Paz though. He was the typical rough-exterior-soft-interior guy and I was rooting for him and Grace to work out (and for him to stop picking on Luisa). Luisa does become a character that is easier to identify with as she tries to balance four (!) different guys, she struggles with self-esteem and going too fast.

Girl v. Boy was an indulging, not wholly realistic and somewhat cheesy read. It becomes predictable but the sparkling banter between the two columnists keep the story moving. It's especially amusing to see the effect the two columnists have on the entire school. Girls become more vocal about what they want and guys have even more questions about what girls want. Trying to figure out the identity of the male columnist will keep you constantly turning the pages as will seeing the big finale and figuring out who wins the winter break competition and the battle of the sexes.

Disclosure: Traded with Steph Su. Thank you =D

Male Monday: Stop Me If You've Heard This One Before

Stop Me If You've Heard This One Before by David Yoo 2008
Hyperion/Disney Book Group

Rating: 3/5

IQ "What can't be debated is that my story is definitely going to turn out to be a cautionary tale. Future mothers tucking their sons in at night will warn them, 'You'd better not try to get what you want in high school, or else you'll get Albert Kimmed' My name will become a national catchphrase denoting abject failure." Albert pg. 3

This is the story of Albert Kim, an intentional loser who falls in love with one of the most popular girls in school. Albert decides to be an intentional loser because he's tired of being made fun of and trying to make friends with people who are constantly laughing at him, why not just accept loser status and move on? Over the summer while working at a local Inn he meets Mia Stone, a surprisingly nice girl for someone who is so popular. He learns that she has just broke up with her long-time boyfriend, Ryan "The House" Stackhouse and lo and behold she thinks Albert is funny. They spend long days working together and by the end of the summer, she declares that they are "something". For the first time since starting high school, Albert is looking forward to the first day of school, entering the building with Mia on his arm. But then they learn that Ryan has cancer and he needs Mia to take care of him. Albert believes Ryan is using his cancer to get Mia back because he's still a jerk and his form of cancer requires radiation and is 95% treatable. Albert is determined to get Mia back, but the whole town of Bern is hoping for his failure.

I didn't like this book as much as I thought I would but I still enjoyed it. I think I was expecting more laugh-out-loud humor, but the humor here is more dry and you may miss some of the references and jokes. My biggest problem with Stop Me If You've Heard This One Before was Albert. It's not good when you don't like the main character. Perhaps I was like the rest of the kids at Albert's school, succumbing to the spell of The House. I thought Albert acted like an almost completely clueless jerk. I understand that The House was a jerk, I was Albert in wanting to shake Mia and get her to wake up on this issue. BUT Albert got so frustrated with Mia for just being a nice person and trying to help her ex-boyfriend (who she is still friends with). Some of Albert's jokes were in poor taste and at first it was amusing, after all in real life, people make awkward jokes in the wrong place at the wrong time. But Albert does this too often for my taste. Ultimately, I didn't have any sympathy for Albert.

Albert's parents are completely clueless as to what's going on in their son's life and I have mixed feelings on this. On the one hand, I could understand why they don't ever question him if they worked two jobs or something like that, but Albert's father has one job (I think his mom works from home or is a housewife because she always makes dinner at 5) and they seem comfortably well off. However, I suppose I can believe that Albert's parents didn't care what he did as long as he got good grades and stayed out of trouble. Besides the parents and my issues with Albert, I thought this novel was really funny and it puts an original spin on the 'first love' story by having the ex boyfriend become an almost sympathetic character. Mia was a nice girl and I liked how she didn't care about what's on the outside. Contrary to popular thought it's not unheard of for a 'geek' to date a popular girl. Their relationship was realistic, full of confusing emotions and miscommunication. When they interact with each other, it's a lot of fun to read because their relationship is so cute.

Stop Me If You've Heard This One Before is a refreshing take on the classic first love story, full of humour, confusion, odd characters and characters that you almost feel sorry for but not quite. I would have liked to see Albert have more endearing qualities, more of the negative stuck out in my mind than the positive. Albert and Mia as a "something" is charming, they have lots of inside jokes and they are both incredibly patient with each other. It was nice to read about Albert giving up on being an intentional loser, he came out of his shell and started to meet people. The group of friends he starts to make is an eccentric and merry group. Read this book for the cute unnamed relationship and ignore the clueless parents and try to keep from wanting to smack Albert (if you've read this book than think about the Cancer Walk incident. I was so mad at him for this!). The ending was unexpected and I appreciated that.

Disclosure: From the library